Have You Looked In Your Sock?

Family legends are usually not planned. If you are the main character in a family story that gets passed down through the years, you hope that you are cast in a favorable light. You want the story to tell about how heroic, brave, intelligent or honest you were. But in reality, you've got little choice in the matter. The story unfolds just like life does. Usually at random. You just hope that the more embarrassing moments are forgotten.

Four years ago the whole family went to a movie. On the way out of the theater I noticed my wallet was missing. I ran back to my seat to look. Couldn't find it. My wife and kids came to help. Couldn't find it. The theater employees couldn't find it. After half an hour I was finally convinced that my wallet had been stolen so I canceled my credit cards, mourned the loss of about a hundred bucks and got ready for bed. I bent over to pull my socks off and as I touched my wallet, I remembered. I was uncomfortable sitting on the wallet and my front pockets were full so I stuck it in my sock during the movie.

I joyfully held the wallet over my head as I walked out of the bedroom. Rather than sharing the joy, my family looked at me like I was the village idiot. To be honest, I saw their point.

The worst part of the story is that it was never forgotten. Four years later, if I ever misplace my keys, remote control, wallet, even my car... my kids ask, "Have you looked in your sock?"

Sigh....