I just saw my first commercial for the upcoming Olympics. Intellectually, I realize that there is a ridiculous amount of time and attention and money and politics spent on these games, but I love them anyway. The commercials always make me cry. did I say cry?? I meant tear up (just a little bit). The advertisers for Nike and Gatorade are very manipulative when it comes to my emotions.
There are so many inspiring Olympic moments and I've made a list of my top five. Interestingly the top two have nothing to do with victory.
5...1980 USA Hockey. Completely unoriginal because it's on everybodies list but it's there for a reason.
4...Phelps domination in 2008 swimming. But he needed two "come from behind" victories to do it.
3...Kerry Strug sticks the landing with a broken ankle. Wow!
2...Eddie the Eagle does what we all want to do. With no talent he competes anyway.
1...No contest. This scene still brings tears to my eyes just by thinking of it. In 1992, Dereck Redmond tears his hamstring and can't finish his 400 meter race. He's sobbing and struggling to finish and his father comes out of the stands to carry him across the finish. The scene represnted so much. Striving, failing, and finishing anyway and a fathers love. Here...watch it for yourself while I get a tissue.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VO8b-zIKixM
Or if you prefer...here is the story from ESPN.
The day of the race arrives. Father and son reminisce about what it took for Derek to get to this point. They talk about ignoring past heartbreaks, past failures. They agree that if anything bad happens, no matter what it is, Derek has to finish the race, period.
The top four finishers in each of the two semifinal heats qualify for the Olympic final. As race time approaches for the semifinal 400 heat, Jim heads up to his seat at the top of Olympic Stadium, not far from where the Olympic torch was lit just a few days earlier. He is wearing a T-shirt that reads, "Have you hugged your foot today?"
Derek Redmond
With the help of his father, an injured Derek Redmond completed his race in the 1992 Olympics.
The stadium is packed with 65,000 fans, bracing themselves for one of sport's greatest and most exciting spectacles. The race begins and Redmond breaks from the pack and quickly seizes the lead. "Keep it up, keep it up," Jim says to himself.
Down the backstretch, only 175 meters away from finishing, Redmond is a shoo-in to make the finals. Suddenly, he hears a pop. In his right hamstring. He pulls up lame, as if he had been shot.
"Oh, no," Jim says to himself. His face pales. His leg quivering, Redmond begins hopping on one leg, then slows down and falls to the track. As he lays on the track, clutching his right hamstring, a medical personnel unit runs toward him. At the same time, Jim Redmond, seeing his son in trouble, races down from the top row of the stands, sidestepping people, bumping into others. He has no credential to be on the track, but all he thinks about is getting to his son, to help him up. "I wasn't going to be stopped by anyone," he later tells the media.
On the track, Redmond realizes his dream of an Olympic medal is gone. Tears run down his face. "All I could think was, 'I'm out of the Olympics -- again,'" he would say.
As the medical crew arrives with a stretcher, Redmond tells them, "No, there's no way I'm getting on that stretcher. I'm going to finish my race."
Then, in a moment that will live forever in the minds of millions, Redmond lifts himself to his feet, ever so slowly, and starts hobbling down the track. The other runners have finished the race, with Steve Lewis of the U.S. winning the contest in 44.50. Suddenly, everyone realizes that Redmond isn't dropping out of the race by hobbling off to the side of the track. No, he is actually continuing on one leg. He's going to attempt to hobble his way to the finish line. All by himself. All in the name of pride and heart.
Slowly, the crowd, in total disbelief, rises and begins to roar. The roar gets louder and louder. Through the searing pain, Redmond hears the cheers, but "I wasn't doing it for the crowd," he would later say. "I was doing it for me. Whether people thought I was an idiot or a hero, I wanted to finish the race. I'm the one who has to live with it."
One painful step at a time, each one a little slower and more painful than the one before, his face twisted with pain and tears, Redmond limps onward, and the crowd, many in tears, cheer him on.
Suddenly, Jim Redmond finally gets to the bottom of the stands, leaps over the railing, avoids a security guard, and runs out to his son, with two security people chasing after him. "That's my son out there," he yells back to security, "and I'm going to help him."
Finally, with Derek refusing to surrender and painfully limping along the track, Jim reaches his son at the final curve, about 120 meters from the finish, and wraps his arm around his waist.
"I'm here, son," Jim says softly, hugging his boy. "We'll finish together." Derek puts his arms around his father's shoulders and sobs.
Together, arm in arm, father and son, with 65,000 people cheering, clapping and crying, finish the race, just as they vowed they would. A couple steps from the finish line, and with the crowd in an absolute frenzy, Jim releases the grip he has on his son, so Derek could cross the finish line by himself. Then he throws his arms around Derek again, both crying, along with everyone in the stands and on TV.
"I'm the proudest father alive," he tells the press afterwards, tears in his eyes. "I'm prouder of him than I would have been if he had won the gold medal. It took a lot of guts for him to do what he did."
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Sunday, November 15, 2009
The Captain and Tennille
What was the first album you ever purchased?
In the course of a conversation on music with old (or new) friends the question will eventually come up. Most music questions are subjective and the answers can be debated or changed. Who was the best 70"s band? What was your favorite 80's group? Who are the top 10 singers in your lifetime? There are many possible answers and you can change your mind after listening to someone else's passionate reasoning.
But you only bought your first album one time and there's only one answer. Either you bought it or you didn't. I grew up in the 70's and there were so many good bands that I could have chosen to spend $10 on. I wish I had bought Pink Floyd. That'd be a cool answer. Lynnard Skinnard, The Allman Brothers, CCR, or Queen....all would be proud answers to the question. I didn't really care for KISS or AC/DC but I'd be in good company if one them was my first. I loved REO, Fleetwood Mac, and Styx so it's a mystery why they weren't my first. If I wanted mellow, why didn't I go with Billy Joel or Simon and Garfunkel. There wouldn't even be any shame in the very 70's Abba or BeeGees.
But my first album was The Captain and Tennille. I know, I know. I can't explain it either. I remember I bought in K-Mart at the same time my brother bought Olivia Newton John. I swear...we are both heterosexual males.
Fortunately I fare much better when I am asked about my first concert. Because in 1980 I saw those macho bad boys from down under ----
--- Air Supply!
Oh Yeah!! Manhood restored!!
In the course of a conversation on music with old (or new) friends the question will eventually come up. Most music questions are subjective and the answers can be debated or changed. Who was the best 70"s band? What was your favorite 80's group? Who are the top 10 singers in your lifetime? There are many possible answers and you can change your mind after listening to someone else's passionate reasoning.
But you only bought your first album one time and there's only one answer. Either you bought it or you didn't. I grew up in the 70's and there were so many good bands that I could have chosen to spend $10 on. I wish I had bought Pink Floyd. That'd be a cool answer. Lynnard Skinnard, The Allman Brothers, CCR, or Queen....all would be proud answers to the question. I didn't really care for KISS or AC/DC but I'd be in good company if one them was my first. I loved REO, Fleetwood Mac, and Styx so it's a mystery why they weren't my first. If I wanted mellow, why didn't I go with Billy Joel or Simon and Garfunkel. There wouldn't even be any shame in the very 70's Abba or BeeGees.
But my first album was The Captain and Tennille. I know, I know. I can't explain it either. I remember I bought in K-Mart at the same time my brother bought Olivia Newton John. I swear...we are both heterosexual males.
Fortunately I fare much better when I am asked about my first concert. Because in 1980 I saw those macho bad boys from down under ----
--- Air Supply!
Oh Yeah!! Manhood restored!!
Monday, November 2, 2009
They Come and They Go
People move in and out of your life. In fact, I'd say that in ten years you will have forgotten most of the people you spent time with this week. They were co-workers, classmates, neighbors or even friends. But unless there is a "blood tie" it is hard to keep all of these people in your life as your life changes. At least most of the time you have some say about who you choose to keep in your life, but thats not always the case.
A relationship between two people involves a lot more than two people doesn't it? Divorce is a good example because you typically aren't just divorcing your partner, you also divorce their entire families. All of the in-laws become people that you used to be related to. I've been through that and there are nieces and nephews that I miss but I was one of the two main characters in that break-up so I knew what was coming.
But now I'm a fringe player in another loss because my daughter just broke up with her boyfriend of two years. We all loved this kid! He stayed at the house, he played board games with the family and we even traveled with him. Then "Poof" he's gone. At least when you are the main character in the break-up, you get to know the reasons and mentally prepare and say your good-byes. Samantha actually didn't tell us for a couple of weeks because she worried about our reaction. The reasons for the break-up were mature enough and naturally my reaction was to support her, but still... it was hard not to say, "What the Hell?!" "Why?" "What about checking with me first??"
I know that this is just a natural part of modern courtship and in the end I just want them to both be happy. Of course we form attachments to the people our kids date for a long period of time. It's hard not to love someone who loves your kid! But from now on I'm going to maintain a bit of distance and not get too attached. We parents have to remember, it is THEIR relationship - not ours. I trust her judgement and I'm guessing that usually our own great kids will be drawn to other great kids. In fact she's already seeing a guy who seems like another nice kid.
But I'm not getting attached this time. And I'm going to start a movement to bring back arranged marriages. It probably wouldn't have worked before but I believe that my generation really does know best!
A relationship between two people involves a lot more than two people doesn't it? Divorce is a good example because you typically aren't just divorcing your partner, you also divorce their entire families. All of the in-laws become people that you used to be related to. I've been through that and there are nieces and nephews that I miss but I was one of the two main characters in that break-up so I knew what was coming.
But now I'm a fringe player in another loss because my daughter just broke up with her boyfriend of two years. We all loved this kid! He stayed at the house, he played board games with the family and we even traveled with him. Then "Poof" he's gone. At least when you are the main character in the break-up, you get to know the reasons and mentally prepare and say your good-byes. Samantha actually didn't tell us for a couple of weeks because she worried about our reaction. The reasons for the break-up were mature enough and naturally my reaction was to support her, but still... it was hard not to say, "What the Hell?!" "Why?" "What about checking with me first??"
I know that this is just a natural part of modern courtship and in the end I just want them to both be happy. Of course we form attachments to the people our kids date for a long period of time. It's hard not to love someone who loves your kid! But from now on I'm going to maintain a bit of distance and not get too attached. We parents have to remember, it is THEIR relationship - not ours. I trust her judgement and I'm guessing that usually our own great kids will be drawn to other great kids. In fact she's already seeing a guy who seems like another nice kid.
But I'm not getting attached this time. And I'm going to start a movement to bring back arranged marriages. It probably wouldn't have worked before but I believe that my generation really does know best!
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Driving on Ice
Jonah's had his learners permit for a month now and I have to admit that he has been an excellent driver from the very first day. He seems completely natural behind the wheel and is eager to learn more.
Just like city kids learn to drive in traffic, mountain kids learn to drive by cliffs on ice. This morning was his first opportunity to do that. While we were still sitting in the driveway I told him that he just needed to know two things. Drive much slower and leave a lot of room between you and the car in front.
"Ya, Dad, I know."
At the first stop sign I told him he approached it too fast for driving on ice.
He said that he didn't see any ice so I told him about black ice and that you can't always see it.
"Ya Dad, I know."
Swan Mountain is between my house and the high school. It's curvy, steep, narrow, and often icy. (even in June) The top speed limit is 35mph. Jonah was doing about 30mph on a downhill curve when he started fish tailing on black ice.
Into oncoming traffic.
For a few seconds our van pivoted back and forth and couldn't decide if it was going to go left into the Jeep or right off the embankment. (I was hoping for the embankment)
To my credit, I didn't scream, yell instructions, or grab the wheel. To his credit he didn't scream, over correct, or slam on the brakes. I'm not sure if there was screaming in the Jeep or not. Although Jonah got us into the mess he very expertly got us out of it as the oncoming cars went wide around us.
I smiled at him. "That was scary."
"Yes it was." he calmly admitted.
When we got to the high school I told him that other than almost getting us killed he did a very nice job. I asked him if he knew now why he needs to go slow on ice.
"Ya, Dad."
Now I know he knows.
Just like city kids learn to drive in traffic, mountain kids learn to drive by cliffs on ice. This morning was his first opportunity to do that. While we were still sitting in the driveway I told him that he just needed to know two things. Drive much slower and leave a lot of room between you and the car in front.
"Ya, Dad, I know."
At the first stop sign I told him he approached it too fast for driving on ice.
He said that he didn't see any ice so I told him about black ice and that you can't always see it.
"Ya Dad, I know."
Swan Mountain is between my house and the high school. It's curvy, steep, narrow, and often icy. (even in June) The top speed limit is 35mph. Jonah was doing about 30mph on a downhill curve when he started fish tailing on black ice.
Into oncoming traffic.
For a few seconds our van pivoted back and forth and couldn't decide if it was going to go left into the Jeep or right off the embankment. (I was hoping for the embankment)
To my credit, I didn't scream, yell instructions, or grab the wheel. To his credit he didn't scream, over correct, or slam on the brakes. I'm not sure if there was screaming in the Jeep or not. Although Jonah got us into the mess he very expertly got us out of it as the oncoming cars went wide around us.
I smiled at him. "That was scary."
"Yes it was." he calmly admitted.
When we got to the high school I told him that other than almost getting us killed he did a very nice job. I asked him if he knew now why he needs to go slow on ice.
"Ya, Dad."
Now I know he knows.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
A Fall Drive
I should have been a trucker.
Forget the fact that I can't even back a trailer out of a driveway. I just like driving. It relaxes me. Putting miles behind me feels like progress even if I'm not going anywhere.
This Sunday, with a lot on my mind and no plans I just got in the car and started driving Colorado's back roads. I didn't plan on a 300 mile, 8 hour trip but thats what happened.
As you can see from the pictures below, I picked an excellent weekend to do it. I've said this before but I'll say it again. I live in a BEAUTIFUL part of this planet.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
For Noah on his 18th Birthday
Noah,
There is so much I want to tell you on your 18th birthday. The law says that legally you are a man now and honestly...that sends me into a panic because I feel like there is so much that I've neglected to say or teach you. Life is sooo fast. I swear you were just born last Sunday. On Tuesday you were climbing on to the roof when we weren't looking. And just yesterday it seems you were asking me to help you build a jet pack in the garage. It happened too fast and I'm not ready for you to be 18! I think that most advice a parent gives an 18 year old is swiftly forgotten. But maybe if I write it down, you can keep it and read it again occasionally and one day you might find some wisdom in it.
Noah, you have so much potential. Please don't settle for average. Please don't settle for what is easy or safe. The world can be scary. Life isn't fair. But I'm going to tell you a secret. We are all pretending. It's true. We are all scared. We are just guessing at the answers and nobody is as cool or confident as you think they are. We all wear masks when we go out in the world, Noah.
Smile. You don't do it often enough but you light up the room when you do. One day a girl is going to fall in love with you because of that smile.
Remember...Look people in the eye and give a firm handshake. I can't explain it but trust me. (it's a guy thing)
Make friends with all types of people and keep your eyes and mind open to everyone. Sometimes, the coolest friends are hiding in the oddest people.
Don't be afraid of strong women. If you find one that falls in love with your smile...make sure she is your equal and marry her.
Dance. I don't dance but I regret it. You'll always be popular with the ladies if you aren't afraid to dance. You don't even have to be good! Just don't be afraid!
Be proud of who you are. You are part of me - you are part of Mom. You are part of your grandparents. You are part of a thousand people who were born and lived and loved and died and passed a part of themselves on to create something incredible...you. Remember that and pass it on.
Trash talking is over rated. Be humble, be gracious.
You are the only person on this planet who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at school, or work, or the life in your mind. You are in charge of the life of your heart...your soul. I know that you tend to dismiss anything that can't be proven with science Noah, but it's your soul that truly defines who you are. It's your soul that will give you comfort when you're sad, or scared, or lonely. There really is something in the universe that is bigger than we are. Please be receptive and open to it when it comes to you.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. You will not understand this until years from now - but try. Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Love it. Take care of it. It's the best thing you'll ever own.
Care about people. Really work at it if you have to. Don't dismiss their interests, music, religion, games or friends. It's a small world when you only put your happiness at the top.
Remember the compliments. Forget the insults.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Hug your father. Men should never be ashamed to show love. Hug your mother. She's the first woman that ever loved you. Understand that they are human and try to forgive their mistakes. Be nice to your brother and sister (even when it's hard!). Visit them and talk about the times when you were kids. They're your best link to the past and the people that will most likely stick with you in the future.
Do what makes you happy. Be yourself. It's OK to follow the beat of a different drummer as long as you remain a part of the world. Don't give up too easily, Noah. Be willing to invest the time to achieve your goals. Be honest. Talk is cheap. If you say you are going to do something - do it. Living your life with integrity and honesty is the only way to live. People will respect you for it but more importantly, you'll respect yourself. Always do your best.
I believe in you , Noah. Believe in yourself.
I love you,
Dad
There is so much I want to tell you on your 18th birthday. The law says that legally you are a man now and honestly...that sends me into a panic because I feel like there is so much that I've neglected to say or teach you. Life is sooo fast. I swear you were just born last Sunday. On Tuesday you were climbing on to the roof when we weren't looking. And just yesterday it seems you were asking me to help you build a jet pack in the garage. It happened too fast and I'm not ready for you to be 18! I think that most advice a parent gives an 18 year old is swiftly forgotten. But maybe if I write it down, you can keep it and read it again occasionally and one day you might find some wisdom in it.
Noah, you have so much potential. Please don't settle for average. Please don't settle for what is easy or safe. The world can be scary. Life isn't fair. But I'm going to tell you a secret. We are all pretending. It's true. We are all scared. We are just guessing at the answers and nobody is as cool or confident as you think they are. We all wear masks when we go out in the world, Noah.
Smile. You don't do it often enough but you light up the room when you do. One day a girl is going to fall in love with you because of that smile.
Remember...Look people in the eye and give a firm handshake. I can't explain it but trust me. (it's a guy thing)
Make friends with all types of people and keep your eyes and mind open to everyone. Sometimes, the coolest friends are hiding in the oddest people.
Don't be afraid of strong women. If you find one that falls in love with your smile...make sure she is your equal and marry her.
Dance. I don't dance but I regret it. You'll always be popular with the ladies if you aren't afraid to dance. You don't even have to be good! Just don't be afraid!
Be proud of who you are. You are part of me - you are part of Mom. You are part of your grandparents. You are part of a thousand people who were born and lived and loved and died and passed a part of themselves on to create something incredible...you. Remember that and pass it on.
Trash talking is over rated. Be humble, be gracious.
You are the only person on this planet who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at school, or work, or the life in your mind. You are in charge of the life of your heart...your soul. I know that you tend to dismiss anything that can't be proven with science Noah, but it's your soul that truly defines who you are. It's your soul that will give you comfort when you're sad, or scared, or lonely. There really is something in the universe that is bigger than we are. Please be receptive and open to it when it comes to you.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. You will not understand this until years from now - but try. Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Love it. Take care of it. It's the best thing you'll ever own.
Care about people. Really work at it if you have to. Don't dismiss their interests, music, religion, games or friends. It's a small world when you only put your happiness at the top.
Remember the compliments. Forget the insults.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Hug your father. Men should never be ashamed to show love. Hug your mother. She's the first woman that ever loved you. Understand that they are human and try to forgive their mistakes. Be nice to your brother and sister (even when it's hard!). Visit them and talk about the times when you were kids. They're your best link to the past and the people that will most likely stick with you in the future.
Do what makes you happy. Be yourself. It's OK to follow the beat of a different drummer as long as you remain a part of the world. Don't give up too easily, Noah. Be willing to invest the time to achieve your goals. Be honest. Talk is cheap. If you say you are going to do something - do it. Living your life with integrity and honesty is the only way to live. People will respect you for it but more importantly, you'll respect yourself. Always do your best.
I believe in you , Noah. Believe in yourself.
I love you,
Dad
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Healthcare
I stopped blogging about political issues once the election was over and my guy won. I thought "we're in good hands now and the president doesn't need my help." But since everyone of us has a stake in the healthcare debates now raging across the country I'm feeling the urge to step in with my undervalued opinion. I recently started worrying about it more than I have in the past because of some deep layoffs in my company and the realization that could lose my job and my health benefits. I also have an adult daughter now who will come off my policy as soon as she stops attending college. The thought of myself being uninsured worries me, the thought of my kid being uninsured sends me into a panic!
I'm in awe - a sickening sort of awe - as I watch protestors across the nation screaming against socialized health care. Does anybody see the irony of senior citizens on medicaid yelling at congressmen that they are against socialized medicine? Did you see the sign held up by the woman that said "Keep Your Government Hands Off My Medicare"? Does anybody shake their head in disbelief as Republican Senators with their gold plated government healthcare condemn any plans to give that same care to the rest of us?
That's right. Our politicians enjoy taxpayer-funded healthcare. All of the senators and representatives in Washington enjoy health benefits that are fully paid by you and me. I don’t see any of America’s politicians opting out of their taxpayer-funded plans in favor of the supposedly superior private health plans, do you? They have the luxury of coverage at taxpayer expense, while we taxpayers have to worry about where or whether we will even get coverage, much less coverage that we can afford.
A main argument from the right is that they don't want government bureaucrats making healthcare decisons for them. But our current private system has insurance company bureaucrats deciding which medical procedures they will cover and which they will not. They also decide whether or not they will cover you at all and how much you must pay them for your coverage. Insurance companies dictate to doctors what care you are allowed, compromising what would otherwise be the best medical practices in the world. The biggest difference between the government and the insurance bureaucrats is that insurance companies actually have an incentive to give you less care because they will make more money by denying claims and treatments.
Many claim that America has the best healthcare system in the world. Sadly, that is just not true. We only have the most expensive system in the world. Are we getting our money’s worth?
Choose any type of health measurement and compare America against any other industrialized nation. The comparison is not good. Life expectancy in the U.S. ranks 24th in the world. Life expectancy in the U.S. ties with Slovenia. We rank 29th in the world for infant mortality. Even Cuba ranks ahead of us. We fare poorly in several other rankings as well, including overall cost, access, and health outcomes. It turns out that America has, at best, the 24th best healthcare system in the world. Want to know what the top 23 countries are doing? They all have universal healthcare.
A generation ago, working for only one company over the course of your career was the norm. Today, the average worker will work for six different companies. Additionally, more workers than ever before are self-employed or run small businesses. Employer-sponsored healthcare no longer makes any sense. Many of my conservative friends and relatives have the traditional family where mom stays home with the kids and dad goes to work and gets the employer based health policy. Well if dad leaves or dies, mom cannot continue to stay at home and care for the children as before. She must, in a time of crisis, look for a (full-time) job with healthcare benefits. Countless Americans remain in their jobs when they would rather stay home to care for their children, simply because they have to in order to continue their medical insurance coverage. That is not exactly “family values.”
Forty-seven million Americans are now uninsured and that number is growing as job losses continue. Uninsured people still get sick. They still visit the doctor or, worse, the emergency room, which is 10 times the cost. Who pays? Those of us with insurance. I went to the podiatrist last month for some foot pain. The total bill for an xray, 20 minutes of the doctors time and some shoe inserts cost $850. It doesn't take a genius to see that there is a lot more rolled into that bill than the care I received. You and I are ALREADY paying for the uninsured every time we pay a premium; we pay again every time our premiums go up. And our premiums will continue to go up. The price of insurance premiums is rising much faster than wages, and there is no end in sight.
In America, we believe that we all deserve equal protection from crime and fire. The police and the firemen should respond to you just as fast as they respond to Donald Trump, right? We believe that the poor have the same right to clean water and safe roads as the rich. We even pass laws guaranteeing that everyone have affordable access to cable TV! But in this the greatest nation on earth, a country as well off, as caring, as Christian, as the United States of America, it is unacceptable that our politicians would say that we can have equal rights in so many things but if I want the same coverage as them, then I'm a socialist.
There! I got that off my chest. Let me know if anything I said changed your opinion on the subject!
I'm in awe - a sickening sort of awe - as I watch protestors across the nation screaming against socialized health care. Does anybody see the irony of senior citizens on medicaid yelling at congressmen that they are against socialized medicine? Did you see the sign held up by the woman that said "Keep Your Government Hands Off My Medicare"? Does anybody shake their head in disbelief as Republican Senators with their gold plated government healthcare condemn any plans to give that same care to the rest of us?
That's right. Our politicians enjoy taxpayer-funded healthcare. All of the senators and representatives in Washington enjoy health benefits that are fully paid by you and me. I don’t see any of America’s politicians opting out of their taxpayer-funded plans in favor of the supposedly superior private health plans, do you? They have the luxury of coverage at taxpayer expense, while we taxpayers have to worry about where or whether we will even get coverage, much less coverage that we can afford.
A main argument from the right is that they don't want government bureaucrats making healthcare decisons for them. But our current private system has insurance company bureaucrats deciding which medical procedures they will cover and which they will not. They also decide whether or not they will cover you at all and how much you must pay them for your coverage. Insurance companies dictate to doctors what care you are allowed, compromising what would otherwise be the best medical practices in the world. The biggest difference between the government and the insurance bureaucrats is that insurance companies actually have an incentive to give you less care because they will make more money by denying claims and treatments.
Many claim that America has the best healthcare system in the world. Sadly, that is just not true. We only have the most expensive system in the world. Are we getting our money’s worth?
Choose any type of health measurement and compare America against any other industrialized nation. The comparison is not good. Life expectancy in the U.S. ranks 24th in the world. Life expectancy in the U.S. ties with Slovenia. We rank 29th in the world for infant mortality. Even Cuba ranks ahead of us. We fare poorly in several other rankings as well, including overall cost, access, and health outcomes. It turns out that America has, at best, the 24th best healthcare system in the world. Want to know what the top 23 countries are doing? They all have universal healthcare.
A generation ago, working for only one company over the course of your career was the norm. Today, the average worker will work for six different companies. Additionally, more workers than ever before are self-employed or run small businesses. Employer-sponsored healthcare no longer makes any sense. Many of my conservative friends and relatives have the traditional family where mom stays home with the kids and dad goes to work and gets the employer based health policy. Well if dad leaves or dies, mom cannot continue to stay at home and care for the children as before. She must, in a time of crisis, look for a (full-time) job with healthcare benefits. Countless Americans remain in their jobs when they would rather stay home to care for their children, simply because they have to in order to continue their medical insurance coverage. That is not exactly “family values.”
Forty-seven million Americans are now uninsured and that number is growing as job losses continue. Uninsured people still get sick. They still visit the doctor or, worse, the emergency room, which is 10 times the cost. Who pays? Those of us with insurance. I went to the podiatrist last month for some foot pain. The total bill for an xray, 20 minutes of the doctors time and some shoe inserts cost $850. It doesn't take a genius to see that there is a lot more rolled into that bill than the care I received. You and I are ALREADY paying for the uninsured every time we pay a premium; we pay again every time our premiums go up. And our premiums will continue to go up. The price of insurance premiums is rising much faster than wages, and there is no end in sight.
In America, we believe that we all deserve equal protection from crime and fire. The police and the firemen should respond to you just as fast as they respond to Donald Trump, right? We believe that the poor have the same right to clean water and safe roads as the rich. We even pass laws guaranteeing that everyone have affordable access to cable TV! But in this the greatest nation on earth, a country as well off, as caring, as Christian, as the United States of America, it is unacceptable that our politicians would say that we can have equal rights in so many things but if I want the same coverage as them, then I'm a socialist.
There! I got that off my chest. Let me know if anything I said changed your opinion on the subject!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
New York
Me and Samantha spent 3 days in NYC last week. We crammed as much as we could into the time we were there and the highlight of the trip was spending quality time with my 19 year old daughter. Here are some other the highlights.
...had a cabbie that rolled down his window to yell at people...saw Paul McCartney sing on top of the Ed Sullivan theater...Ellis Island...Apollo Theater...bought a hot dog from a street vendor...saw homeless building forts in doorways at night...Museum of Natural History...Times Square...Stautue of Liberty...Ground Zero...Century 21...followed the crowd through intersections against the light...Wicked...top of the Empire State Building...subways...patio cafe's...Chinatown...Dakota...Central Park...Mama Mia...Brooklyn Bridge..bought a purse from a street vendor...Metropolitan Museum of Art...Grants Tomb...Columbia University...Carnegie Hall...United Nations...Wall Street...
New York is incredible. We enjoyed it all and would like to go back. When you travel you can't help but compare where you are to where you are from. You compare the people, the prices, the weather, the culture, the entertainment, etc.
We both received an additional bonus from this trip by realizing that Colorado is an INCREDIBLE place to live. It's good to be home. (but we can't wait to go again!)
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Trudging to the Top
I climbed another of Colorado's 14ers yesterday. My 15th. Only 39 left! Actually "climbed" sounds too athletic. Hiked and walked don't quite fit either. Cantered or pranced? Too ambitious. Ambled, strolled, or meandered? Too casual. Lumbered or marched? Too confident. Wandered and roamed are too aimless. Plodded or slogged? Close. Trudged? Trudged...that's it.
Yesterday I trudged up another mountain. Missouri Mountain this time. Since Missouri doesn't have it's own mountains I don't mind naming one of ours in their honor.
I drove to the trail head Friday night and slept in the van for an early start. I was up by 4:30 and on the trail by 5:15 and was gasping for air with my hands on my knees at 5:20. But aside from my physical conditioning, it was a beautiful day and watching the sun hit the peaks was truly spectacular. If I just took it easy, I might be on top by 9:00. That was if I stayed on the trail. I didn't stay on the trail.
A scree field is a field of loose rock that you have to pick your way through very carefully and it's easy to lose the trail.
Really. Anybody can lose the trail. Really. The smart thing to do when you lose the trail is to back track until you pick it up again. The dumb thing is to keep going forward confident that the trail will have learned its lesson and come back to you. I saw the mountain peak ahead of me and chose to do the dumb thing.
And I climbed the wrong peak. (but I made really good time!)
I sat down on Wrong Peak and took a picture of Missouri Mountain...across the valley and an hour away.
So now I had a dilemma. To get to Missouri I would have to descend 500 feet, traverse a ridge for about half a mile and climb back up a thousand feet to the top. I seriously considered returning home and just crossing Missouri off my list anyway. No one would know and I could tell myself that I was close enough. I started down and didn't completely decide until I reached the point where I could continue down or turn back up.
An hour later I was on top of the right mountain.
Yesterday I trudged up another mountain. Missouri Mountain this time. Since Missouri doesn't have it's own mountains I don't mind naming one of ours in their honor.
I drove to the trail head Friday night and slept in the van for an early start. I was up by 4:30 and on the trail by 5:15 and was gasping for air with my hands on my knees at 5:20. But aside from my physical conditioning, it was a beautiful day and watching the sun hit the peaks was truly spectacular. If I just took it easy, I might be on top by 9:00. That was if I stayed on the trail. I didn't stay on the trail.
A scree field is a field of loose rock that you have to pick your way through very carefully and it's easy to lose the trail.
Really. Anybody can lose the trail. Really. The smart thing to do when you lose the trail is to back track until you pick it up again. The dumb thing is to keep going forward confident that the trail will have learned its lesson and come back to you. I saw the mountain peak ahead of me and chose to do the dumb thing.
And I climbed the wrong peak. (but I made really good time!)
I sat down on Wrong Peak and took a picture of Missouri Mountain...across the valley and an hour away.
So now I had a dilemma. To get to Missouri I would have to descend 500 feet, traverse a ridge for about half a mile and climb back up a thousand feet to the top. I seriously considered returning home and just crossing Missouri off my list anyway. No one would know and I could tell myself that I was close enough. I started down and didn't completely decide until I reached the point where I could continue down or turn back up.
An hour later I was on top of the right mountain.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Happy Fathers Day
There are many ways to measure success, not the least of which is the way your children describe you when talking to a friend. - Author Unknown
This week like every other 3rd week of June that I remember, fathers are in the news. Celebrities and presidents are speaking of memories of their dads or the importance of being a good father. I pay attention. I'm not saying that I don't also pay attention to Mother's Day. Mothers get plenty of attention and rightfully so. Seems like there are many more good mothers (including my own) than there are good fathers so in addition to a day set aside to appreciate us, we also get reminders and lectures on the importance of being a good one.
I had a good one.
I want to make sure he knows because now that I am a father of three teens, I'm constantly asking the question of myself. Am I doing a good job? Will they recover from my mistakes? Am I a good role model? Always questions! So although I don't yet have the answers on how I am doing as a father, I wanted to provide some answers to him.
He showed me that just simply "being there" for your kids was important. He made it to all teachers meetings, plays, concerts, sporting events, and even put in the required coaching duties
I know that racism is wrong because of my dad. He came from the segregated south and when I was 8 we were visiting his home town and we went to the public pool for a swim on a hot sticky summer afternoon. The pool was surrounded by chain link and as all of us white children were enjoying the cool water, dozens of sweaty black children hung on the fence and stared at us. I asked my dad why they weren't swimming and he explained that they weren't allowed and that the law was wrong and people were stupid and we left.
I know how to work because of my dad. After a few decades of white collar work, he took an early retirement to move to Minnesota to be by my mom's parents. The idea was to get another job suited to his talents and management skills for the last ten years of his career. The December after they moved I went out to visit and watched him pump gas in the minus 20 degree wind chill. Jobs he was looking for were slow in coming so instead sitting and waiting and whining he worked at the local gas station until an administrative position opened up at the local college.
I want to contribute to make the world better because of my dad. After he finally retired he volunteered to work with kids in the school system. Most of the grandparent volunteers wanted to work with the younger elementary children, but dad volunteered in the middle school for over ten years. He received a Volunteer of the Year award and today hundreds and hundreds of kids(and now adults) call him grandpa in addition to his own 7 grand kids.
So Dad...just in case you didn't already know this...you are a good dad and I'm proud to be your son. I hope I live up to your example. Love, Jim
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Paradise with a Price
For 3 months a year, I live in paradise. It's easy to forget that when it is still snowing in mid-June.
I went for a walk this morning while most were still sleeping (always the best time of the day) and even after 6 years here I am still amazed by the beauty around me. Every direction could be a post card. From now until mid September the temperatures will seldom get above 80. Humidity and bugs are practically non-existent. When storms roll through they are dramatic and exciting (thunder in stereo) and are quickly followed by blue skies and fresh mornings. The air is invisible as it should be. Water is plentiful and pure.
And there's the people! Summit County is the fittest county in Colorado. Colorado is the fittest state in the nation. And there are no age limits. I've climbed mountains and found 7 year old girls with their 70 year old grandfathers already at the top when I arrived. Sharing the ski slopes with 80 year olds is common. In my experience, healthy people are happy people and happy people are great neighbors.
Recreation? Most cars are equipped with racks that carry bikes, skis, canoes, snowboards, and kayaks. If their toys are too big they have a trailer to pull the snow mobiles, 4 wheelers, sailboats and rafts. If that's too much activity for your weekend, then choose among several festivals that are held every single weekend in the summer. What interests you? Jazz? Film? Wine? Art? BarBQ? There's a festival you can walk to that people come to from all over the country.
I live in paradise...for 3 months a year.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Quotes to live by
I've been doing some deep cleaning in the house. Very deep cleaning. Every photo and every knicknac is studied and either organized, given away or tossed out. Yesterday I found a handful of 3 by 5 cards with various quotes written on them. I started writing down quotes in 1978 and it looks like I wrote the last one in 1995. I remember writing down quotes that supported my own philosophy...quotes that made an impression. I wrote them down and even had many of them memorized (back when I could remember anything)
Very often when you get a chance to revisit the past and you are introduced to who you used to be, you don't always recognize that person. People change, ideas evolve, truths expand. And although I have changed and hopefully grown over the past 30 years, I discovered that I like these sayings and recognize their truth as much as I originally did. I don't think I intended to collect quotes that were so similar to each other but now I can see that there is a definite theme running through them. Perhaps among them is my own philosophy of life that these wise men and women have expressed much better than I ever could. Here they are.
The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. - Eleanor Roosevelt
There is only one success... to be able to spend your life in your own way.
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler. - Henry David Thoreau
Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. Henry David Thoreau
That man is the richest whose pleasures are the cheapest. Henry David Thoreau
The determined man finds a way, the other finds an excuse.
Everything can be taken from man but one thing, the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances - to choose ones own way. Dr. Victor Frankl
Success is a journey, not a destination. We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.
I finally figured out that the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it. - Rita Mae Brown
Change occurs when we take responsibility for our own thoughts, decisions and actions. - C. Palladino
The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness. - Eric Hoffer
There is more to lfe than increasing its speed. - Mahatma Gandhi
Death is not the enemy; living in constant fear of it is. - Norman Cousins
A man may fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he blames someone else.
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to ones courage. - Anais Nin
People do not lack strength, they lack will. - Victor Hugo
Action is eloquence - Shakespere
It is only those who do nothing that make no mistakes. - Joseph Conrad
It is not only what we do but what we do not do for which we are accountable. - Moliere
Go as far as you can see, and when you get there you will see farther. - Orison Sweet Marden
You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down. - Mary Pickford
And finally here is the quote that started it all. I actually memorized this in high school. It's still my favorite.
It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiently, who errs and comes up short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat. - Theodore Roosevelt
Very often when you get a chance to revisit the past and you are introduced to who you used to be, you don't always recognize that person. People change, ideas evolve, truths expand. And although I have changed and hopefully grown over the past 30 years, I discovered that I like these sayings and recognize their truth as much as I originally did. I don't think I intended to collect quotes that were so similar to each other but now I can see that there is a definite theme running through them. Perhaps among them is my own philosophy of life that these wise men and women have expressed much better than I ever could. Here they are.
The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. - Eleanor Roosevelt
There is only one success... to be able to spend your life in your own way.
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler. - Henry David Thoreau
Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. Henry David Thoreau
That man is the richest whose pleasures are the cheapest. Henry David Thoreau
The determined man finds a way, the other finds an excuse.
Everything can be taken from man but one thing, the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances - to choose ones own way. Dr. Victor Frankl
Success is a journey, not a destination. We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.
I finally figured out that the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it. - Rita Mae Brown
Change occurs when we take responsibility for our own thoughts, decisions and actions. - C. Palladino
The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness. - Eric Hoffer
There is more to lfe than increasing its speed. - Mahatma Gandhi
Death is not the enemy; living in constant fear of it is. - Norman Cousins
A man may fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he blames someone else.
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to ones courage. - Anais Nin
People do not lack strength, they lack will. - Victor Hugo
Action is eloquence - Shakespere
It is only those who do nothing that make no mistakes. - Joseph Conrad
It is not only what we do but what we do not do for which we are accountable. - Moliere
Go as far as you can see, and when you get there you will see farther. - Orison Sweet Marden
You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down. - Mary Pickford
And finally here is the quote that started it all. I actually memorized this in high school. It's still my favorite.
It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiently, who errs and comes up short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat. - Theodore Roosevelt
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
You Must Pay The Rent!
"You Must Pay The Rent!"
Imagine me saying that line with a top hat, a cape, and a skinny waxed mustache. That's how I picture myself everytime I have to collect delinquent rent from my tenants. I don't enjoy it. I put it off as long as possible hoping the check will be in the next days mail. But in nearly 20 years of doing it, I must admit it has gotten easier. And that's a good thing because there is a whole lot of rent that's not getting paid these days.
One of my first (and worst) situations was trying to get money from a Chester Fried Chicken franchisee in one my food courts. The guy was retired after a career in the Army where he ran NCO clubs. He thought he had the skills to manage a small fast food franchise and he sunk his entire life savings ...against his wifes vehement protests...into this venture. He was already circling the drain before I got to the mall and became his landlord and nothing I could do was going to save him. He was going out of business and my orders from corporate were to get as much money as possible from him to settle his debt. He and I and our attorneys met in a conference room and the guy was literally in tears. He said he lost everything and his wife wasn't even speaking to him. And although I personally would have let him off the hook, I had to ask him for more money. He would make an offer and I'd step out of the room to call my boss and come back in and have to say "not good enough". At the end I only ended up with about twenty percent of what he owed but it took most of what he had left and we even made him sell his van to give us another couple thousand. When he left I could tell that facing me was nothing compared to what he was going to face when he got home.
It was an ugly experience but I definitely learned something from it. It's easier to collect rent if people think you are a son of a bitch. Word got around the mall that the new mall manager took a guys van and made him cry. For three years in a row after that I received the annual award for having the lowest collection balances in the company.
When I switched jobs, rent collection was still an important part of the job description. We had a Christmas store that was always struggling with rent, but I knew that the guy lived in a nice home, drove a nice car, and was frequently in the society pages, so I didn't feel that bad for him. I ended up suing him and he showed up in court with a cashiers check for the entire $30,000 that he owed. It was strange since he had been claiming poverty just the day before but I had my money and didn't question it ...until the police questioned me 6 weeks later.
Turns out that Mr. Christmas was also the president of the local charter school and he had embezzled from them to pay me. We returned the money to the school and evicted Mr. Christmas, who is still in jail as I write this. The story made the paper of course, which was fine with me. Because now my tenants know that there was a guy who would rather go to jail than owe me money. You don't have to be a son of a bitch but sometimes it doesn't hurt if people think you are!
Imagine me saying that line with a top hat, a cape, and a skinny waxed mustache. That's how I picture myself everytime I have to collect delinquent rent from my tenants. I don't enjoy it. I put it off as long as possible hoping the check will be in the next days mail. But in nearly 20 years of doing it, I must admit it has gotten easier. And that's a good thing because there is a whole lot of rent that's not getting paid these days.
One of my first (and worst) situations was trying to get money from a Chester Fried Chicken franchisee in one my food courts. The guy was retired after a career in the Army where he ran NCO clubs. He thought he had the skills to manage a small fast food franchise and he sunk his entire life savings ...against his wifes vehement protests...into this venture. He was already circling the drain before I got to the mall and became his landlord and nothing I could do was going to save him. He was going out of business and my orders from corporate were to get as much money as possible from him to settle his debt. He and I and our attorneys met in a conference room and the guy was literally in tears. He said he lost everything and his wife wasn't even speaking to him. And although I personally would have let him off the hook, I had to ask him for more money. He would make an offer and I'd step out of the room to call my boss and come back in and have to say "not good enough". At the end I only ended up with about twenty percent of what he owed but it took most of what he had left and we even made him sell his van to give us another couple thousand. When he left I could tell that facing me was nothing compared to what he was going to face when he got home.
It was an ugly experience but I definitely learned something from it. It's easier to collect rent if people think you are a son of a bitch. Word got around the mall that the new mall manager took a guys van and made him cry. For three years in a row after that I received the annual award for having the lowest collection balances in the company.
When I switched jobs, rent collection was still an important part of the job description. We had a Christmas store that was always struggling with rent, but I knew that the guy lived in a nice home, drove a nice car, and was frequently in the society pages, so I didn't feel that bad for him. I ended up suing him and he showed up in court with a cashiers check for the entire $30,000 that he owed. It was strange since he had been claiming poverty just the day before but I had my money and didn't question it ...until the police questioned me 6 weeks later.
Turns out that Mr. Christmas was also the president of the local charter school and he had embezzled from them to pay me. We returned the money to the school and evicted Mr. Christmas, who is still in jail as I write this. The story made the paper of course, which was fine with me. Because now my tenants know that there was a guy who would rather go to jail than owe me money. You don't have to be a son of a bitch but sometimes it doesn't hurt if people think you are!
Saturday, April 18, 2009
He Could Have Been an Idol
Seems I've been making several apologies lately for decades old wrongs I've committed. Now my old friend Troy wants one too.
We were discussing American Idol last week and he insisted that he could have been a singing star if I hadn't crushed his dream in 1981. I won't say that he has an inflated opinion of his talents because that would just be being cruel to him all over again. And besides, I'm no singing judge. Maybe Simon would have loved him.
Anyway here's my confession...
I lived with Troy in an awful single wide trailer just off campus. I don't remember the details but apparently there was a college sponsored talent contest coming up and Troy had entered it to sing. He was in the trailer alone and I was coming home with a date. As soon as we were within 50 feet of the trailer we heard the verses of "Endless Love" and they weren't coming from the stereo.
We started laughing until I put a finger to my lips and we tip toed up the steps and looked through the window. Troy was laying on the couch. He had his eyes closed and one finger in his ear (I don't know why) and he was singing his heart out. He was singing from the bottom of his diaphragm.
Two hearts,
Two hearts that beat as one,
Our lives have just begun.
We watched for about half a minute until we couldn't take it anymore and threw the door open and started singing with him. He jumped up and started stammering an explanation but I couldn't hear it because I was literally on the floor laughing. Now understand...there was nothing wrong with his singing. He wasn't bad, but the situation begged for some teasing. Sure...it sounds mean now but we were college roommates and that's what guys do. If he wanted emotional support he should have joined a sorority.
So I ribbed him for a couple of days and he didn't enter the contest. This week he finally pointed out that I probably wrecked his singing career by mocking him. So here you go Troy....I am sorry. When my daughter gets married, I want you to sing Endless Love at her wedding.
There...anyone else need an apology?
Troy Stout could have been the 1st Clay Aiken if I hadn't interfered.
We were discussing American Idol last week and he insisted that he could have been a singing star if I hadn't crushed his dream in 1981. I won't say that he has an inflated opinion of his talents because that would just be being cruel to him all over again. And besides, I'm no singing judge. Maybe Simon would have loved him.
Anyway here's my confession...
I lived with Troy in an awful single wide trailer just off campus. I don't remember the details but apparently there was a college sponsored talent contest coming up and Troy had entered it to sing. He was in the trailer alone and I was coming home with a date. As soon as we were within 50 feet of the trailer we heard the verses of "Endless Love" and they weren't coming from the stereo.
We started laughing until I put a finger to my lips and we tip toed up the steps and looked through the window. Troy was laying on the couch. He had his eyes closed and one finger in his ear (I don't know why) and he was singing his heart out. He was singing from the bottom of his diaphragm.
Two hearts,
Two hearts that beat as one,
Our lives have just begun.
We watched for about half a minute until we couldn't take it anymore and threw the door open and started singing with him. He jumped up and started stammering an explanation but I couldn't hear it because I was literally on the floor laughing. Now understand...there was nothing wrong with his singing. He wasn't bad, but the situation begged for some teasing. Sure...it sounds mean now but we were college roommates and that's what guys do. If he wanted emotional support he should have joined a sorority.
So I ribbed him for a couple of days and he didn't enter the contest. This week he finally pointed out that I probably wrecked his singing career by mocking him. So here you go Troy....I am sorry. When my daughter gets married, I want you to sing Endless Love at her wedding.
There...anyone else need an apology?
Troy Stout could have been the 1st Clay Aiken if I hadn't interfered.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
The Torch is Passed
I'm pretty sure that physical competiton is mostly a father/son thing. I don't see many mother/daughter pairings wrestling on the floor. But men wrestle with their sons from a young age. For many years its just play. You keep it close and make it look like your son is getting the better of you before you turn him over and tickle him. Later when they are 12 or 13, you can still beat them but you have to put a lot more effort into it than you used to. For a couple of years I've had to fight dirty to beat Noah, but my 17 year domination ended this Sunday.
He had just beat me (easily) in 2 straight games of chess. To get my mojo back, I started rough housing with him. Right away I could tell that this time was different. I'm not sure if he is stronger or I am weaker, but it's probably a combination of both. The struggle wasn't going my way and I actually worried about getting hurt so I surrendered and crowned the new champion. I'm not going to wrestle him again...the rivalry is over.
He can wear the crown for about thirty years...then my grandson is going to kick his butt!
He had just beat me (easily) in 2 straight games of chess. To get my mojo back, I started rough housing with him. Right away I could tell that this time was different. I'm not sure if he is stronger or I am weaker, but it's probably a combination of both. The struggle wasn't going my way and I actually worried about getting hurt so I surrendered and crowned the new champion. I'm not going to wrestle him again...the rivalry is over.
He can wear the crown for about thirty years...then my grandson is going to kick his butt!
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Man
Since I seem to be in a bit of a writing slump, I decided to post an article I like about what defines a man. Not saying I have all of these qualities but it's something to strive for!
By Tom Chiarella
A man carries cash.
A man looks out for those around him -- woman, friend, stranger.
A man can cook eggs.
A man can always find something good to watch on television.
A man makes things -- a rock wall, a table, the tuition money.
Or he rebuilds -- engines, watches, fortunes.
He passes along expertise, one man to the next.
A man fantasizes that kung fu lives deep inside him somewhere.
A man is good at his job. Not his work, not his avocation, not his hobby. Not his career. His job. It doesn't matter what his job is, because if a man doesn't like his job, he gets a new one.
A man can speak to dogs.
A man listens, and that's how he argues. He crafts opinions. He can pound the table, take the floor. It's not that he must. It's that he can.
A man can look you up and down and figure some things out. Before you say a word, he makes you. From your suitcase, from your watch, from your posture. A man infers.
A man owns up. That's why Mark McGwire is not a man. A man grasps his mistakes. He lays claim to who he is, and what he was, whether he likes them or not.
Some mistakes, though, he lets pass if no one notices. Like dropping the steak in the dirt.
A man can tell you he was wrong. That he did wrong. That he planned to. He can tell you when he is lost. He can apologize, even if sometimes it's just to put an end to the bickering.
A man does not wither at the thought of dancing. But it is generally to be avoided.
A man loves the human body, the revelation of nakedness. He loves the sight of the pale bosom, the physics of the human skeleton, the alternating current of the flesh. He is thrilled by the wrist and the sight of a bare shoulder. He likes the crease of a bent knee.
Maybe he never has, and maybe he never will, but a man figures he can knock someone, somewhere, on his bottom.
A man doesn't point out that he did the dishes.
A man knows how to ridicule.
A man gets the door. Without thinking.
A man knows how to lose an afternoon. Playing video games, driving aimlessly, shooting pool.
He knows how to lose a month, also.
A man welcomes the coming of age. It frees him. It allows him to assume the upper hand and teaches him when to step aside.
He understands the basic mechanics of the planet. Or he can close one eye, look up at the sun, and tell you what time of day it is. Or where north is. He can tell you where you might find something to eat or where the fish run. He understands electricity or the internal-combustion engine, the mechanics of flight or how to figure a pitcher's ERA.
A man does not know everything. He doesn't try. He likes what other men know.
A man knows his tools and how to use them -- just the ones he needs. Knows which saw is for what, how to find the stud, when to use galvanized nails.
A miter saw, incidentally, is the kind that sits on a table, has a circular blade, and is used for cutting at precise angles. Very satisfying saw.
He does not rely on rationalizations or explanations. He doesn't winnow, winnow, winnow until truths can be humbly categorized, or intellectualized, until behavior can be written off with an explanation. He doesn't see himself lost in some great maw of humanity, some grand sweep. That's the liberal thread; it's why men won't line up as liberals.
A man resists formulations, questions belief, embraces ambiguity without making a fetish out of it. A man revisits his beliefs. Continually. That's why men won't line up with conservatives, either.
A man is comfortable being alone. Loves being alone, actually. He sleeps.
Or he stands watch. He interrupts trouble. This is the state policeman. This is the poet. Men, both of them.
A man loves driving alone most of all.
A man watches. Sometimes he goes and sits at an auction knowing he won't spend a dime, witnessing the temptation and the maneuvering of others. Sometimes he stands on the street corner watching stuff. This is not about quietude so much as collection. It is not about meditation so much as considering. A man refracts his vision and gains acuity. This serves him in every way. No one taught him this -- to be quiet, to cipher, to watch. In this way, in these moments, the man is like a zoo animal: both captive and free. You cannot take your eyes off a man when he is like that. You shouldn't. Who knows what he is thinking, who he is, or what he will do next.
By Tom Chiarella
A man carries cash.
A man looks out for those around him -- woman, friend, stranger.
A man can cook eggs.
A man can always find something good to watch on television.
A man makes things -- a rock wall, a table, the tuition money.
Or he rebuilds -- engines, watches, fortunes.
He passes along expertise, one man to the next.
A man fantasizes that kung fu lives deep inside him somewhere.
A man is good at his job. Not his work, not his avocation, not his hobby. Not his career. His job. It doesn't matter what his job is, because if a man doesn't like his job, he gets a new one.
A man can speak to dogs.
A man listens, and that's how he argues. He crafts opinions. He can pound the table, take the floor. It's not that he must. It's that he can.
A man can look you up and down and figure some things out. Before you say a word, he makes you. From your suitcase, from your watch, from your posture. A man infers.
A man owns up. That's why Mark McGwire is not a man. A man grasps his mistakes. He lays claim to who he is, and what he was, whether he likes them or not.
Some mistakes, though, he lets pass if no one notices. Like dropping the steak in the dirt.
A man can tell you he was wrong. That he did wrong. That he planned to. He can tell you when he is lost. He can apologize, even if sometimes it's just to put an end to the bickering.
A man does not wither at the thought of dancing. But it is generally to be avoided.
A man loves the human body, the revelation of nakedness. He loves the sight of the pale bosom, the physics of the human skeleton, the alternating current of the flesh. He is thrilled by the wrist and the sight of a bare shoulder. He likes the crease of a bent knee.
Maybe he never has, and maybe he never will, but a man figures he can knock someone, somewhere, on his bottom.
A man doesn't point out that he did the dishes.
A man knows how to ridicule.
A man gets the door. Without thinking.
A man knows how to lose an afternoon. Playing video games, driving aimlessly, shooting pool.
He knows how to lose a month, also.
A man welcomes the coming of age. It frees him. It allows him to assume the upper hand and teaches him when to step aside.
He understands the basic mechanics of the planet. Or he can close one eye, look up at the sun, and tell you what time of day it is. Or where north is. He can tell you where you might find something to eat or where the fish run. He understands electricity or the internal-combustion engine, the mechanics of flight or how to figure a pitcher's ERA.
A man does not know everything. He doesn't try. He likes what other men know.
A man knows his tools and how to use them -- just the ones he needs. Knows which saw is for what, how to find the stud, when to use galvanized nails.
A miter saw, incidentally, is the kind that sits on a table, has a circular blade, and is used for cutting at precise angles. Very satisfying saw.
He does not rely on rationalizations or explanations. He doesn't winnow, winnow, winnow until truths can be humbly categorized, or intellectualized, until behavior can be written off with an explanation. He doesn't see himself lost in some great maw of humanity, some grand sweep. That's the liberal thread; it's why men won't line up as liberals.
A man resists formulations, questions belief, embraces ambiguity without making a fetish out of it. A man revisits his beliefs. Continually. That's why men won't line up with conservatives, either.
A man is comfortable being alone. Loves being alone, actually. He sleeps.
Or he stands watch. He interrupts trouble. This is the state policeman. This is the poet. Men, both of them.
A man loves driving alone most of all.
A man watches. Sometimes he goes and sits at an auction knowing he won't spend a dime, witnessing the temptation and the maneuvering of others. Sometimes he stands on the street corner watching stuff. This is not about quietude so much as collection. It is not about meditation so much as considering. A man refracts his vision and gains acuity. This serves him in every way. No one taught him this -- to be quiet, to cipher, to watch. In this way, in these moments, the man is like a zoo animal: both captive and free. You cannot take your eyes off a man when he is like that. You shouldn't. Who knows what he is thinking, who he is, or what he will do next.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Cheapest Hotel
The most expensive part of travel is usually the over night accommodations. We'd all like to stay at the 5 star resorts, but the budget won't allow it. To travel less expensively, you stay at Super 8 or Motel 6. Is money really tight? Then you'll be rolling into the KOA's.
But what if you've decided to see the whole country in 2 months for $150?
The first night of our hitchhiking adventure, Chuck and I slept under a juniper tree outside of Flagstaff, AZ. It was far enough away from the road to not be seen by traffic, and since we had no tent, the tree offered a little protection from the elements. We wanted to travel as light as possible and being 21 we figured we were tough enough to make do with just sleeping bags. By the next night we had only made it as far as Winslow, AZ and splurged on a box of granola bars before camping under a picnic table at a rest stop. Trust me, an April night in Arizona is not warm and we awoke feeling a little cranky about our adventure thus far.
But as our 3rd day warmed up our fortunes improved and we hit the jackpot when a quiet cowboy in a silver truck took us all the way to Oklahoma City. He was tired but couldn't stop for sleep so he picked us up to help him drive. It was dawn when Cowboy let us out and that's when we discovered the accommodations that we used for the rest of our time on the road. We were at a major interchange with several overpasses and men were emerging from the concrete. We couldn't see where they were coming from...it looked like they were just sinking through the road above. They were walking and sliding down to the road below. When the last of them left we climbed up and found this...
...about three feet of warm, safe, privacy. An they were located every few miles all over the country. No reservations required. Sure, there were drawbacks. Concrete is hard. Freeways are noisy. Trucks were rolling just inches over my face. But we loved the fact that they were everywhere and we would be completely hidden while up there. Even if drivers looked for us we couldn't be seen.
We questioned the safety of our shelter just once in Nashville when I was awakened by Chucks scream. I opened my eyes in time to watch him rolling down to the road below as he fought to stop his descent with a single arm coming out of the breathing hole of his mummy sleeping bag. I probably should have been more concerned but I was laughing so hard I couldn't even find my own bags zipper so I could go down and help him. He was bruised and scraped and sore for days but the memory of it still makes both of us laugh.
So there you go. If you are on an extreme budget, I've just tipped you off to the cheapest hotel I know of. 26 years have passed and I still look under the over passes nearly everyday to see who knows the secret.
But what if you've decided to see the whole country in 2 months for $150?
The first night of our hitchhiking adventure, Chuck and I slept under a juniper tree outside of Flagstaff, AZ. It was far enough away from the road to not be seen by traffic, and since we had no tent, the tree offered a little protection from the elements. We wanted to travel as light as possible and being 21 we figured we were tough enough to make do with just sleeping bags. By the next night we had only made it as far as Winslow, AZ and splurged on a box of granola bars before camping under a picnic table at a rest stop. Trust me, an April night in Arizona is not warm and we awoke feeling a little cranky about our adventure thus far.
But as our 3rd day warmed up our fortunes improved and we hit the jackpot when a quiet cowboy in a silver truck took us all the way to Oklahoma City. He was tired but couldn't stop for sleep so he picked us up to help him drive. It was dawn when Cowboy let us out and that's when we discovered the accommodations that we used for the rest of our time on the road. We were at a major interchange with several overpasses and men were emerging from the concrete. We couldn't see where they were coming from...it looked like they were just sinking through the road above. They were walking and sliding down to the road below. When the last of them left we climbed up and found this...
...about three feet of warm, safe, privacy. An they were located every few miles all over the country. No reservations required. Sure, there were drawbacks. Concrete is hard. Freeways are noisy. Trucks were rolling just inches over my face. But we loved the fact that they were everywhere and we would be completely hidden while up there. Even if drivers looked for us we couldn't be seen.
We questioned the safety of our shelter just once in Nashville when I was awakened by Chucks scream. I opened my eyes in time to watch him rolling down to the road below as he fought to stop his descent with a single arm coming out of the breathing hole of his mummy sleeping bag. I probably should have been more concerned but I was laughing so hard I couldn't even find my own bags zipper so I could go down and help him. He was bruised and scraped and sore for days but the memory of it still makes both of us laugh.
So there you go. If you are on an extreme budget, I've just tipped you off to the cheapest hotel I know of. 26 years have passed and I still look under the over passes nearly everyday to see who knows the secret.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Pay Cut? No Problem!
As unemployment in our country rises above 8%, my own employer continues to make tough decisions. We had another round of lay-offs this week and each cut seems to get harder and harder on everybody. Three months ago, my division of the company had about 100 employees. Today we are less than 70.
This time we all knew what was going on and we knew the risks of being called to the bosses office. My meeting was as at 8:00 and I was told that my salary was getting cut by 5%. I said, “Thank-you, very much.”
All morning people gathered in huddles quietly discussing events. No one could show too much relief because no one had any idea who survived and who didn’t. When making eye contact with someone in the copy room, one person would just lift a wondering eyebrow and the other would respond with a nod. Then you knew you were safe to talk about it and show relief that you weren't going home.
It wasn't completely surprising to anybody. We're in an industry that represents good times and economic health. People are going to cut their ski vacation from the budget before they stop buying socks, milk, or cable TV. It’s actually remarkable and a testament to good management that we haven’t had deeper cuts. During the good times of the past few years we were actually paying down debt instead of acquiring more. I heard one ski resort closed last month…right at peak season. Rumor has it that other companies are obtaining last minute financing to keep from going under.
We could be in much worse shape, but that doesn’t make it any easier to see your friends lose their jobs. Friends with families and mortgages just like me. People with talent and skills and loyalty. After the cuts were final we had a “survivors meeting” and the VP that had to deliver the news to the victims could barely get through it with out choking up. He made the points that the economy was terrible and we had to reduce cost while trying to preserve as many jobs as we could and there were no guarantees that the layoffs were over. In order to preserve as many jobs as possible, everyone had their wages cut and the CEO would take no salary at all this year. I hope its enough to get through until the economy turns around.
Actually I hope it's enough to get through another 3 years until my youngest leaves home. Then I don't need a job or a mortgage. I just haven't decided yet if I'm moving into Todd's basement or Troy's boat. (they think I'm kidding)
This time we all knew what was going on and we knew the risks of being called to the bosses office. My meeting was as at 8:00 and I was told that my salary was getting cut by 5%. I said, “Thank-you, very much.”
All morning people gathered in huddles quietly discussing events. No one could show too much relief because no one had any idea who survived and who didn’t. When making eye contact with someone in the copy room, one person would just lift a wondering eyebrow and the other would respond with a nod. Then you knew you were safe to talk about it and show relief that you weren't going home.
It wasn't completely surprising to anybody. We're in an industry that represents good times and economic health. People are going to cut their ski vacation from the budget before they stop buying socks, milk, or cable TV. It’s actually remarkable and a testament to good management that we haven’t had deeper cuts. During the good times of the past few years we were actually paying down debt instead of acquiring more. I heard one ski resort closed last month…right at peak season. Rumor has it that other companies are obtaining last minute financing to keep from going under.
We could be in much worse shape, but that doesn’t make it any easier to see your friends lose their jobs. Friends with families and mortgages just like me. People with talent and skills and loyalty. After the cuts were final we had a “survivors meeting” and the VP that had to deliver the news to the victims could barely get through it with out choking up. He made the points that the economy was terrible and we had to reduce cost while trying to preserve as many jobs as we could and there were no guarantees that the layoffs were over. In order to preserve as many jobs as possible, everyone had their wages cut and the CEO would take no salary at all this year. I hope its enough to get through until the economy turns around.
Actually I hope it's enough to get through another 3 years until my youngest leaves home. Then I don't need a job or a mortgage. I just haven't decided yet if I'm moving into Todd's basement or Troy's boat. (they think I'm kidding)
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Mowing the Lawn
I like to read good writing. Whether it's an entire book or just a bumper sticker, I love when the words are perfectly chosen and arranged to the point where I'm not just reading information...I'm reading art. And I wish I could do that.
So aside from this blog just being a way to keep in touch with friends and family, writng is something I enjoy. And it's a way to practice the art and to try to come close to some of the writers I admire. Sometimes I'll find that among a thousand words, I've strung ten together that are really good and its worth the time I put into it.
I still enjoy it but sometimes it feels like it's becoming a chore. It's like watching the grass in your yard get longer and longer and knowing that you should cut it. It just kind of nags at your brain and you imagine that the neighbors are shaking their heads and blaming you for their sinking property values until you can't take the pressure and you shuffle out and mow your lawn. When you're done, you don't feel pride at a job well done. Just relief that the chore isn't nagging at you anymore.
Any of you other bloggers feel that way? Natalie? Kelly? Brooke? Do you suspect that after a week of nothing new, your readers are saying "Bad blogger, bad blogger! Go to your room!"?
Sorry. I like writing, but I hate mowing the lawn.
So aside from this blog just being a way to keep in touch with friends and family, writng is something I enjoy. And it's a way to practice the art and to try to come close to some of the writers I admire. Sometimes I'll find that among a thousand words, I've strung ten together that are really good and its worth the time I put into it.
I still enjoy it but sometimes it feels like it's becoming a chore. It's like watching the grass in your yard get longer and longer and knowing that you should cut it. It just kind of nags at your brain and you imagine that the neighbors are shaking their heads and blaming you for their sinking property values until you can't take the pressure and you shuffle out and mow your lawn. When you're done, you don't feel pride at a job well done. Just relief that the chore isn't nagging at you anymore.
Any of you other bloggers feel that way? Natalie? Kelly? Brooke? Do you suspect that after a week of nothing new, your readers are saying "Bad blogger, bad blogger! Go to your room!"?
Sorry. I like writing, but I hate mowing the lawn.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Ski Day
A day on the mountain is always better than a day at work. But yesterday I nearly questioned that expression. It was our company ski day and the offices closed for a day of skiing. Or as we say in the ski business, "testing the product".
It was cold, windy, and sunless when I awoke and I hoped it would clear up later but it never did. I picked up my friend Shunnie, drove to Vail and met the rest of our co-workers at the top.
You probably realize that when you ski with co-workers who work for Vail Resorts, you are skiing with excellent skiers. I am not in that category. I can't even fake it anymore because 2 years ago I got hauled off the mountain in a toboggan and straight onto an ambulance. It was hard to keep that quiet when it ruined at the office ski day that year. People remember. I can tell they still keep their eyes on me and ski easier trails when I'm around. I protest that I haven't fallen since then but it's too late. My reputation is established.
Yesterdays conditions were bad. Icy crust and the wind was just about blowing us back up the hill. Icicles formed from our chins as we rode the chairlifts. Nobody wanted to be there but nobody wanted to admit it because we were certain that a day on the mountain was better than a day at work. Lunch at the Game Creek private club was a definite high point and it was the only place I could take a picture. I posted it below.
After lunch, a few of us were standing around (in a freaking blizzard) wondering where to ski next. I knew no one wanted to ski and no one wanted to admit it. So since it was already established that I was the weak link of ski days, I took one for the team and said I didn't want to ski anymore.
"No?" my boss asked.
"Hell No" I confirmed.
Then they readily agreed that if Jim was done they might as well quit too. I bravely sacrificed my reputation (what reputation I have left after my pedicure anyway) to save my friends from freezing.
That's the way I'm going to look at it anyway.
It was cold, windy, and sunless when I awoke and I hoped it would clear up later but it never did. I picked up my friend Shunnie, drove to Vail and met the rest of our co-workers at the top.
You probably realize that when you ski with co-workers who work for Vail Resorts, you are skiing with excellent skiers. I am not in that category. I can't even fake it anymore because 2 years ago I got hauled off the mountain in a toboggan and straight onto an ambulance. It was hard to keep that quiet when it ruined at the office ski day that year. People remember. I can tell they still keep their eyes on me and ski easier trails when I'm around. I protest that I haven't fallen since then but it's too late. My reputation is established.
Yesterdays conditions were bad. Icy crust and the wind was just about blowing us back up the hill. Icicles formed from our chins as we rode the chairlifts. Nobody wanted to be there but nobody wanted to admit it because we were certain that a day on the mountain was better than a day at work. Lunch at the Game Creek private club was a definite high point and it was the only place I could take a picture. I posted it below.
After lunch, a few of us were standing around (in a freaking blizzard) wondering where to ski next. I knew no one wanted to ski and no one wanted to admit it. So since it was already established that I was the weak link of ski days, I took one for the team and said I didn't want to ski anymore.
"No?" my boss asked.
"Hell No" I confirmed.
Then they readily agreed that if Jim was done they might as well quit too. I bravely sacrificed my reputation (what reputation I have left after my pedicure anyway) to save my friends from freezing.
That's the way I'm going to look at it anyway.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Sweet Feet
I did something yesterday for the first time in my life. I got a pedicure. It wasn't on my list of things to do before I die...I just sort of stumbled into it. I sit on a home owners board and for Christmas they sent me a spa gift card worth $100. I was excited and was looking forward to a nice massage. At least I was looking forward to it until I checked the prices at this very exclusive spa and saw that massages started at $200. So I started looking down the list of services.
I could get my hair high lighted for $125...no
I could get my eyebrows designed with a perfect arch for just $75...pass
The Perfect Eyes treatment was $95 came with the eyebrow arching plus eye shadow recommendations...tempting.
The Gentlemans Manicure was only $50 but if I wasn't getting nail polish then it just seemed like paying a pretty girl to hold my hand....I decided against it.
Then I saw the Signature Pedicure. I thought it was just having someone clip my toenails. But no. It is a cuticle trim, nail shape, exfoliation & polish. It is a complete pedicure using their signature Ginger Peach line. Sounded too tempting and I scheduled it.
I told my boss that I was leaving work for a pedicure. Becka felt that this was an occasion that should be witnessed so she scheduled one with me. His and Her pedicures with my boss. We arrived and I informed my (pedicurist? nail girl? foot artist?) that I was a first timer and asked her to be gentle with me. I'm not sure what all of the steps were in my pedicure because I was laying back in my massage chair with my eyes closed. I do know that it involved hot bubbly water, clippers, some sort of mineral salts, a big old file that looked like it belonged in my garage, and some sort of moisturizer from their signature ginger peach line. Since I have apparently been neglecting my feet for many decades, that big old garage file got a pretty good work out on the bottom of my feet.
Did any of you guys know that you were supposed to be filing the bottoms of your feet?
I skipped the nail polish but when I saw how good Becka's nails looked with a Hot Bubble Gum shade, I regretted my conservatism. But on the other hand, I could put my shoes on when we were done and she had to walk in flip flops with cottonballs between her toes into a mountain winter day.
Over all, it was a nice experience as long as I didn't have to pay for it. And my feet felt so nice last night that I kept myself awake by rubbing them on my legs.
I may have to bring my file out of the garage and keep it in the shower from now on.
Monday, February 9, 2009
You're Fired
With all of the lay-offs in the news, I’ve been wondering how the word is actually given to the victims. When Panasonic says the are laying off 15,000 people, how do they actually go about it? Email? Bulletin board? Does each person get pulled into an office for a private chat? Or do pink slips really exist that people just find in an envelope with their last paycheck?
I’ve had to fire people. It was always hard, but I’ll admit it did get easier. I can’t remember the name of the first guy I had to fire but I remember everything else about it. I was in my first supervisory position just a couple years out of college. He was the worlds worst parking lot attendant. He wouldn’t shower, he glared at customers, he was seldom on time, he couldn’t count money accurately, and his co-workers hated him. There were complaints everyday. He deserved to be fired but I couldn’t do it. I’d like to say it’s because I was such a nice guy who could see the good in everyone, but that’s not true. I was just afraid to fire someone. I got a four year business degree from a good university and it just never came up in any class.
So I counseled him about cash counting, and gave him warnings about being late, but how do you tell an adult he smells bad and needs to take a shower? He didn’t improve and the other employees were losing respect for me so I had to do it. I lost sleep for 3 nights while I worried about. I worked on various scripts in my head. I had answers for anything he’d say. I had a nice version and a stern version. On the chosen day, I met him at the end of his shift and said,
“It isn’t working out. We’ll have to let you go.”
He shrugged and walked away. It was that easy.
Over the next 20 years I fired a bunch of people. Some were for budget reasons, some were for performance issues. On one bad day, I even fired 6 at once. It was never easy but it was never as hard as that first time.
It's true that you learn more from life than you do from school, but I still think every business degree should offer Firing 101.
I’ve had to fire people. It was always hard, but I’ll admit it did get easier. I can’t remember the name of the first guy I had to fire but I remember everything else about it. I was in my first supervisory position just a couple years out of college. He was the worlds worst parking lot attendant. He wouldn’t shower, he glared at customers, he was seldom on time, he couldn’t count money accurately, and his co-workers hated him. There were complaints everyday. He deserved to be fired but I couldn’t do it. I’d like to say it’s because I was such a nice guy who could see the good in everyone, but that’s not true. I was just afraid to fire someone. I got a four year business degree from a good university and it just never came up in any class.
So I counseled him about cash counting, and gave him warnings about being late, but how do you tell an adult he smells bad and needs to take a shower? He didn’t improve and the other employees were losing respect for me so I had to do it. I lost sleep for 3 nights while I worried about. I worked on various scripts in my head. I had answers for anything he’d say. I had a nice version and a stern version. On the chosen day, I met him at the end of his shift and said,
“It isn’t working out. We’ll have to let you go.”
He shrugged and walked away. It was that easy.
Over the next 20 years I fired a bunch of people. Some were for budget reasons, some were for performance issues. On one bad day, I even fired 6 at once. It was never easy but it was never as hard as that first time.
It's true that you learn more from life than you do from school, but I still think every business degree should offer Firing 101.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Worth It
I don't need to see the odds against winning. I don't need to hear that it's money down the toilet and don't tell me it's foolish.
I'm still going to buy a couple lottery tickets every week.
For two dollars a week I get a 10 minute fantasy. I'm rich. I quit my job, give money to my family, and live in luxury. I buy a couple homes and I travel around the world. I decide I'll need a bodyguard. Maybe a cook or an assistant. A personal trainer definitely. Maybe I'll find one person to do all of those jobs. I wonder if I should hire a private accountant or go with a big firm to manage my money. I figure out how much I'll pay in taxes and get annoyed at the amount. I worry about spoiling my children. I'm concerned about everyone that will be looking for handouts. Where should I live? Could I trust new friends?
So much to think about. I enjoy it. Carrying around a pocket full of possibilities is worth much more to me than the coffee or the slurpee I could have had for the same price.
So shut up! It's worth it!
I'm still going to buy a couple lottery tickets every week.
For two dollars a week I get a 10 minute fantasy. I'm rich. I quit my job, give money to my family, and live in luxury. I buy a couple homes and I travel around the world. I decide I'll need a bodyguard. Maybe a cook or an assistant. A personal trainer definitely. Maybe I'll find one person to do all of those jobs. I wonder if I should hire a private accountant or go with a big firm to manage my money. I figure out how much I'll pay in taxes and get annoyed at the amount. I worry about spoiling my children. I'm concerned about everyone that will be looking for handouts. Where should I live? Could I trust new friends?
So much to think about. I enjoy it. Carrying around a pocket full of possibilities is worth much more to me than the coffee or the slurpee I could have had for the same price.
So shut up! It's worth it!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Pulling Teeth
Its wisdom teeth time at my house. With the threat of lay offs everywhere, I decided it would be prudent to get any possible medical issues taken care of while I still had insurance. It was Noah’s turn yesterday.
I took the day off, loaded up on soft food and took him into the oral surgeon at 11:00. At 12:15 a nurse brought him out in a wheelchair and said everything went fine. I looked at Noah and raised and eyebrow. He was drooling and babbling incoherently. So I told her, “This isn’t the same boy I turned over to you.”
She laughed and assured me that the reaction to the anesthesia was normal and he just needed to sleep it off. We managed to get his coat on and wheeled him outside to the mini-van. He kept talking nonsense while I swung by the pharmacy for the Vicodin and mouth rinse and took him home and tucked him in bed. His last word was “dog” as Mario nuzzled him and he went to sleep. He woke at about 4:00 and had no memory of anything after he walked back to the operation room until he woke up at home.
Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to sleep through every unpleasant event in your life? Just wake up and say, “well that’s over with!” I think anesthesia should be administered a lot more liberally.
Samantha’s turn tomorrow. Hopefully it goes just as easy.
I took the day off, loaded up on soft food and took him into the oral surgeon at 11:00. At 12:15 a nurse brought him out in a wheelchair and said everything went fine. I looked at Noah and raised and eyebrow. He was drooling and babbling incoherently. So I told her, “This isn’t the same boy I turned over to you.”
She laughed and assured me that the reaction to the anesthesia was normal and he just needed to sleep it off. We managed to get his coat on and wheeled him outside to the mini-van. He kept talking nonsense while I swung by the pharmacy for the Vicodin and mouth rinse and took him home and tucked him in bed. His last word was “dog” as Mario nuzzled him and he went to sleep. He woke at about 4:00 and had no memory of anything after he walked back to the operation room until he woke up at home.
Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to sleep through every unpleasant event in your life? Just wake up and say, “well that’s over with!” I think anesthesia should be administered a lot more liberally.
Samantha’s turn tomorrow. Hopefully it goes just as easy.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
I'm Faster
I was watching some old home videos the other night. Really old. From 1981, I think. This particular clip was just about 40 seconds long and it captured the end of a road race that me and my brother were competing in. I spent the last few days trying to find a way to put this movie clip into my blog but I can't figure it out so I'll have to describe it. I'll try to post the film later.
The video starts with a police car coming towards the camera with its sirens going. About 100 feet behind the car are two skinny guys in really tight, short, polyester, yellow shorts and identical blue tanktops. I'm not sure why we usually dressed the same when we ran, but it's cute...trust me.
This race is important because although we ran several races every year and we usually did well in them, neither of us had ever actually won one. We had never run directly behind the police sirens. Never had been in the very front.
Anyway, in the video me and Rick are running stride for stride behind the sirens and one of us is going to finally win this race. The film is grainy and doesn't offer any proof that I struck a bargain with Rick, but I will testify and admit that I suggested we finish together. We were both exhausted and nobody was close to catching us and we were dressed the same and we were brothers and it would have been just very special to have us both cross together. So with about 500 hundred feet to go, I offered a tie and Rick accepted. We were just going to coast together to the finish line.
The video skips a section and the next scene shows both of us in a mad sprint to the finish...but we aren't together...I'm about 2 feet ahead of him. I finish first and Rick comes in second. The camera stays on us and Rick looks angry and he won't look at me. That's it. End of film. That's the incident that has been held over my head for 28 years. He's even paid me back and we should be even. The very next year in army basic training there was a contest called King of the Ring. Two hundred men stand in a large circle and the last man in the circle is the winner. No other rules. When there were about 30 of us left, I offered Rick another tie. And he agreed. But when we were down to the last 4, he threw his man out while I was still grappling with mine on the edge of the ring. Rick ran over and and pushed us both out. He was king. I say that should make us even.
But the race story kept getting repeated to friends and family (and it was on film), so I'm the one that can't be trusted in the heat of battle. So here's the point I hope you remember from this story. It's not that I used to be young and fast. It's not that athletic shorts used to be tight and polyester. I'm not even trying to make the point that your word is your bond or that a damaged reputation is hard to recover from.
The main point I'm trying to make and that I want you to remember is that...I won that race. Rick came in second.
The video starts with a police car coming towards the camera with its sirens going. About 100 feet behind the car are two skinny guys in really tight, short, polyester, yellow shorts and identical blue tanktops. I'm not sure why we usually dressed the same when we ran, but it's cute...trust me.
This race is important because although we ran several races every year and we usually did well in them, neither of us had ever actually won one. We had never run directly behind the police sirens. Never had been in the very front.
Anyway, in the video me and Rick are running stride for stride behind the sirens and one of us is going to finally win this race. The film is grainy and doesn't offer any proof that I struck a bargain with Rick, but I will testify and admit that I suggested we finish together. We were both exhausted and nobody was close to catching us and we were dressed the same and we were brothers and it would have been just very special to have us both cross together. So with about 500 hundred feet to go, I offered a tie and Rick accepted. We were just going to coast together to the finish line.
The video skips a section and the next scene shows both of us in a mad sprint to the finish...but we aren't together...I'm about 2 feet ahead of him. I finish first and Rick comes in second. The camera stays on us and Rick looks angry and he won't look at me. That's it. End of film. That's the incident that has been held over my head for 28 years. He's even paid me back and we should be even. The very next year in army basic training there was a contest called King of the Ring. Two hundred men stand in a large circle and the last man in the circle is the winner. No other rules. When there were about 30 of us left, I offered Rick another tie. And he agreed. But when we were down to the last 4, he threw his man out while I was still grappling with mine on the edge of the ring. Rick ran over and and pushed us both out. He was king. I say that should make us even.
But the race story kept getting repeated to friends and family (and it was on film), so I'm the one that can't be trusted in the heat of battle. So here's the point I hope you remember from this story. It's not that I used to be young and fast. It's not that athletic shorts used to be tight and polyester. I'm not even trying to make the point that your word is your bond or that a damaged reputation is hard to recover from.
The main point I'm trying to make and that I want you to remember is that...I won that race. Rick came in second.
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